1、TWO HEARTS BEATING
Nurse: H
兩顆心臟在跳動
護士：手術後你感覺怎樣？
病人：十分好，只是我能感覺到我體內有兩顆心臟在跳動。
護士：怪不得給你做手術的大夫剛纔在到處尋找他的手錶。
2、THE FIRST TIME
Patient: I' s frightened, this is first peratin.
Surgen: I n
Mther: H
Neighbr: ur vercat? But hw culd it ae such a nise?
Husband: I... I happened t be inside the cat.
精力旺盛的妻子
鄰居：昨天夜裏我聽見你家屋前有很大的聲音，你們出了什麼事嗎？
丈夫：沒什麼。我的妻子有點不高興，把我的大衣給扔到窗外去了。
鄰居：你的大衣？扔掉大衣怎麼會有那麼大的.聲音？
丈夫：我......我恰好也在大衣裏面。
8、Friend fr Dinner
&qut;Hne,&qut; said the husband t his wife, &qut;I invited a friend he fr supper.&qut;
&qut;What? Are u craz? The huse is a ess, I haven't been shpping, all the dishes are dirt, and I dn't feel lie cing a fanc eal!&qut;
&qut;I nw all that.&qut;
&qut;Then wh did u invite a friend fr supper?&qut;
&qut;Because the pr fl's thining abut getting arried.&qut;
請朋友吃飯
“親愛的，”丈夫對妻子說：“我邀請了一位朋友回家吃晚飯。”
“什麼？你瘋了嗎？我們的房子亂糟糟的，我很久沒有買過東西回來了，所有的碗碟都是髒的，還有，我可不想做一餐累死人的晚飯。”
“這些我全都知道。”
“那你爲什麼還要邀請朋友回來吃晚飯？”
“因爲那個可憐的笨蛋正考慮要結婚呢。”
9、GOOD ADVICE
The prtl sales anager was getting read t leave his dctr's ffice after a rutine exainatin. &qut;Here,&qut; said the dctr, &qut;fllw this diet, and I want t see three-furths f u bac here fr a chec-up in three nths.&qut;
忠告
臃腫的銷售經理做過常規體檢後，正要離開大夫的診室。“聽着，”大夫說，“遵守這個食譜，我希望3個月後再來這兒體檢時能見到四分之三的你。”
10、SHE'D RATHER BU A GIFT
While n a trip, M realized that she had frgtten a present fr Dad's birthda. &qut;That's a,&qut; he said, &qut;The nl thing I want is fr u t lve, hnr and be.&qut; M pndered that idea and then replied &qut;I'd rather bu u a gift.&qut;
她寧願買一件禮物
旅途中，媽媽想起她忘記給爸爸買一件生日禮物。&qut;沒關係，&qut;他說，&qut;我最想要的東西是你的愛、忠貞和溫順。&qut;媽媽沉思片刻後回答說，&qut;我寧願給你買一件禮物。
